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Whatever the reason, tonight, his rage ignites in a flash.
I watch, terrified, as his flushed face knots up in hatred. Is it because my sister and I stand between him and his liquid candy?
Keeping my screams pressed down, I hold my hand over my mouth, watching the man who I thought was ...
Continue Reading →The first chapter of Shadow Heart, Book 1 in the Broken Bottles Series, tells a story of an alcoholic parent, alone with his young daughters, the only thing on his mind – getting to his bottle.
Nicky and Jenise, age 8 and 5, are alone with their father. Their mother works the night shift at Juvenile Hall in San Francisco. Nicky, the youngest of the two describes the feeling in the room: sparks, igniting, pacing, his angry red face . . ...
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It seems like the appropriate time to talk about stability.
For this survivor of family addiction and trauma, having it meant everything.
How did I reach it? How do I have it all these years later when the walls seem to shake around me?
Here is one tip I’ve found invaluable, even when all I wanted was to shut down:
Keep reaching out!
All too often I let relationships come and go in my life, from family to friends. Reaching back to them, taking the ...
Continue Reading →“The evening begins when I am eight and my sister, eleven. We were trying to finish dinner before he’d unraveled. Within minutes, I’m hiding under the dining room table, cowering’ praying that he won’t see my hiding place.”
Hiding places – we all have them when growing up in a family that battles addiction. The rage – physical and mental – comes unexpectedly. We never know when our daily life will change. We are children that hope for the loving parent ...
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I’ve been thinking a lot about risk lately. Just the word used to cause a shudder in my body from head to toe. Risk. I knew I needed to take it when growing up in my family if I was going to change anything. You see my father was an alcoholic. All the dysfunction you might imagine came with it. Rage, violence–verbal and physical intimidation–the codependent mother trying to keep the peace, and my sister and I, left to carve ...
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