RISK-HOW WE DO IT EVERYDAY

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I’ve been thinking a lot about risk lately. Just the word used to cause a shudder in my body from head to toe. Risk. I knew I needed to take it when growing up in my family if I was going to change anything.  You see my father was an alcoholic. All the dysfunction you might imagine came with it. Rage, violence–verbal and physical intimidation–the codependent mother trying to keep the peace, and my sister and I, left to carve ...

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DATING AND INVITING FRIENDS OVER MY HOUSE

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DATING? INVITING FRIENDS OVER?

I didn’t dare.

I couldn’t let them see what it was like at home.

Growing up in a dysfunctional family, at least for me, extended far beyond the walls of my house.

I didn’t date – I couldn’t take the chance they’d come to my house, hoping to meet my family, or hang out in my room, only to have my father burst in, overly affectionate, or raging that I’d brought someone home who wasn’t good enough.

Those judgments weren’t just ...

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FAMILY SECRETS: REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME YOU SHARED ONE?

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“My dad’s an alcoholic, Alex.”

“I thought it was something like that,” she said.

To finally share my life with someone older, but still my peer, was a relief, and the conversation we had that day cemented the relationship with my new woman friend.”

— Shadow Heart, Book 1 of the Broken Bottles Series

HOW DOES IT FEEL TO SHARE A FAMILY SECRET?

• Do you feel like you’ve betrayed your family?
• Are you relieved to finally share a part ...

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REMEMBERING GUILT, TRYING TO BECOME INDEPENDENT

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THREE GUILTY FEELINGS WHEN TRYING TO BECOME INDEPENDENT

There are several memories that flash through my head when I remember moments that I disappointed my family. I don’t know why I hold onto them so tightly. Are these the things that keep us wound up?

It’s harder to forgive myself than it is to forgive others.

  • My grandmother
  • My father
  • My son

My grandmother was dying. I didn’t know it, but she was. Her last few months of life were spent at my parents’ house. She ...

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HOW I STAYED DETACHED FROM MY FAMILY’S ADDICTION

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HOW I STAYED DETACHED FROM DAD’S ALCOHOLISM

 

What are the adventures we create to enter an alternate world of joy, love, and a healthy family when we are only children?

For me, it was making friends, real and imaginary.

  • Real friends
  • Food
  • Things to do at school
  • Clubs
  • Volunteering
  • My sister

My neighbor was my best friend. I hopped the fence to play at her house any time I could. She was real. Her parents knew about my dad, but never talked about it. They saw him passed out ...

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