REMEMBERING GUILT, TRYING TO BECOME INDEPENDENT

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THREE GUILTY FEELINGS WHEN TRYING TO BECOME INDEPENDENT

There are several memories that flash through my head when I remember moments that I disappointed my family. I don’t know why I hold onto them so tightly. Are these the things that keep us wound up?

It’s harder to forgive myself than it is to forgive others.

  • My grandmother
  • My father
  • My son

My grandmother was dying. I didn’t know it, but she was. Her last few months of life were spent at my parents’ house. She ...

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HOW I STAYED DETACHED FROM MY FAMILY’S ADDICTION

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HOW I STAYED DETACHED FROM DAD’S ALCOHOLISM

 

What are the adventures we create to enter an alternate world of joy, love, and a healthy family when we are only children?

For me, it was making friends, real and imaginary.

  • Real friends
  • Food
  • Things to do at school
  • Clubs
  • Volunteering
  • My sister

My neighbor was my best friend. I hopped the fence to play at her house any time I could. She was real. Her parents knew about my dad, but never talked about it. They saw him passed out ...

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Women who are Fifty-Can you Find me a Magazine?

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Yes, I’m into my fifties now. Hooray! Each morning I look for another line on my lips. Soon I’ll give up. Maybe there will be so many of them they’ll combine to form a nice new lip again. Yes, I’m kidding.

Somehow women in their fifties seem to get lost, don’t they? We’re not climbing the ladder any longer, and certainly can’t claim any resemblance, physically or otherwise to  our thirties and forties.

We’re almost or are done with parenting, but we’re ...

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TRANSITIONS IN LIFE

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Transition. It’s a word that can strike fear in all ages, and both sexes. When we’re young, it can mean facing the decision of an adult.  When in our early 20’s, it can mean embracing a more mature life and making serious career or relationship choices.

Women of transition — what does this mean?  It begins at 35 or so, when that first lip line or wrinkle or sag in the eyelid becomes noticeable. But beyond the ...

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How I prayed when my father raged

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We all handle fear differently.

When we grow up in a family battling addiction, we cross our fingers (sometimes our toes) and hope for the best every day. We never knew what we going to get when my father came home, or when we came home.  This is how Shadow Heart Opens.

I always prayed the same way at night: “Now I lay me down to

sleep. I pray the lord my soul to keep. If I die before I wake, I pray

the ...

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